An Oddly Introspective Post for no Real Reason

When I consider my background, upbringing and all that, well, to be honest I’m not quite sure how I ended up a being a (questionably) professional artist.  I didn’t decide to follow my dream after traveling the world and finding myself on a high mountain in a third world country.  I came from a family of teachers and preachers.  Really.  Almost all of em.  Aunts, uncles, you name it.  We did honest things, worked hard to help others, and never had much to spare.  Never poor, but plenty of cornbread and beans.  Teaching was always encouraged. For awhile in high school I though of architecture.  That was very encouraged.  So was a career in sciences and oceanography, nearly applying to UCSD to go hang out on Scripps pier and measure ocean stuff. I had the highest SAT score in my school and nearly a 4.0 gpa, for what they’re worth, and could have gone a lot of different directions at that pivotal time in life 20 years ago.  Then I started getting really into art and the wheels fell off the train. Art was not encouraged as a career path.  It always had to do with money.  Thank God for punk rock.  Saved me from that line of thinking and I find myself today not living an ordinary life by most measures.  I’m half-broke and all that, but I’m also half rich so there.  All this is just to say I am incredibly thankful to be where I’m at, hardships and all.  Wouldn’t trade em for the world.  And when folks talk about wishing they could afford a painting of mine one day, while instead they buy a greeting card or a poster or tshirt, and especially when they begin to explain what I should do and where I should go to find the folks with the money, I sort of climb inside myself to a little bench I carved out a long time ago made of rough-hewn lowered expectations and wish there was a way to let them know that they themselves are the folks who support me and make me successful.  Sure I do have some incredibly well off folks buy art from time to time and it’s a lot of fun to connect with them on that level, but my daily bread is from the folks who come from the same place I come from.  We just get by.

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